I just re-read my previous blog, it’s been 8 months since I last wrote something in here…WHEW where has the time gone??  So much has happened in the past 8 months… And I CANNOT believe how fast the past few months have come and gone.  A few milestones worthy of mentioning:

Graduation 2010 – Convocation… FINALLY! After 6.5 years of hardcoreness, 4.5 semesters of school, and almost 2 years of work experience later… I finally got my expensive piece of paper!!! lol Totally worth all the sleepless nights, the long days, and the many, many moments where I wondered whether or not I’ve gone crazy yet. lol

Walking across the graduation stage in heels – my 15 secs of fame as my loved ones screamed in the background. hehe But I did it, I walked across the stage in high heels, and in none other than my lovely bootiful heels that I bought right before I injured myself.

I landed a 6 month job with the government -Challenging at times, but I’m learning a lot and gaining the coveted work experience necessary for all new grads!  But the tough moments only make me stronger – so thank you for being horrible.  I’m learning to stand up for myself.  When injustice is done, you need to speak up for yourself because no one else is going to.  A sometimes draining, tedious and soul sucking environment, I’m learning to deal.

I started to pay back my student loans – Graduating with so much debt is one of those really nerve-wracking things… but with the help of my sister, I started to learn to budget earlier this year, and I’ve managed to pay off a good chunk of my student loans so far.  So, I’m VERY proud and excited to learn that! Money use to always elude me, the concept of money was too abstract for me to grasp before… but my sister and I sat down, and she helped to make money more concrete a concept for me, so now, I FINALLY GET IT! LOL

I’ve decided to embark on a new journey in my life - I decided recently that I need a change, very badly.  So, in the next few months, I’m going to work really hard, save really hard, and I’m going to make a few more of my dreams come true.. lol That part will be To Be Continued…   My loved ones know what I’m talking about.. hehe The rest of you (whomever else has a link to the blog), will have to wait… heheheh

Anyways, time to get back to chilling out on my awesome sunday, practice some French for my practice exam on Tuesday (and then the final exam on Sept 7th), and play on my wii! lol

Take care and thanks for tuning in!

Skydiving October 6, 2009~

As I sit here dreading the 12 hours of InDesign Classroom in a book that I have to go through…. I started to read back on some of my previous posts.  I often forget how much I love blogging…. Something about writing and getting my thoughts and feelings out…. It’s VERY LIBERATING!!!!   And you know I’m all for that!! lol

So, I’ve done it again.  I’ve piled myself up with a whole wack of things to do. LOL  Let’s compare it to previous years… LOL My last 12 credits of my Undergraduate degree, full time work, and part time work once a week.  12 hour days twice a week. LOL  It’s crazy, but motivating!  I’m getting back into the gymmie (twice a week), going to physio to make my ankle better…. I can feel it getting stronger every day.  My ankle was definitely one of the more difficult set backs I’ve experienced to date.  The difficulty in doing the every day things that I love, it felt like my body was betraying me for a while…  It was soooooo hard… And there were so many occasions where I wanted to give up……it was SOOOOOOOOOOOOO easy to give up on it, especially considering how many times I kept reinjuring it….  But I’m glad I didn’t give up.  I’m glad that I’ve been going to physio for almost 2 months now, and I’m doing my exercises every night… And I FINALLY can feel it getting stronger…. *thumbs up*  I guess we really take things like our health for granted…. And that’s really unfortunate.  It really is.  I miss running like you would not believe…  One of my goals for this year is to start running again… And to be able to wear high heels comfortably for my graduation this year.  I also would like to try pilates or hot yoga once my ankle is better better.

You know, lately, I’ve started to realize that it’s easier to be lazy and it’s easy being bad.  Being good, and doing the things that are good for you is actually really HARD.  It’s strange, it’s soooooooooooooooooo easy to learn bad habits… but LEARNING and KEEPING good habits are soooooooo difficult.  Why is that?  Is it the society that we live in that is absolutely corrosive and too superficial for anyone’s own good?  I wonder…. I mean, I don’t really enjoy clubbing like the clubbers in Vancouver do.  Sometimes I miss dancing, so I’ll go dancing.  But I personally CANNOT STAND the snobby, superficial clubbing scene. Oftentimes I find myself just enjoying all the little stuff in between, going for a walk, engaging in thought-provoking conversation, going out for a nice dinner, etc.  Just the simple stuff.  Life is already so complicated, why do people choose to complicate it further?  If we really learnt how to break things down and simply them, then our lives would be so much more satisfying… That’s what I think at least…

*sigh*  You know what’s super hard?  When you strive to do the challenging things, and the people in your life that are supposed to care about you cannot support you.  They discourage you, and they tell you it’s impossible.  And that’s so hard.  I grew up with important people in my life telling me that I’m incompetent and that I will never accomplish anything.  If I believed them, I wouldn’t be the person I am today.  I push myself hard b/c I know that the only way we can achieve our goals, our dreams, our passions, is to push ourselves to the limit.  Setting goals is really important too.

I’m so proud of myself, last year, I managed to check off a good chunk of things that I’ve had on my list of goals since 2006! I joined indoor soocer, found a salsa partner and did salsa, I jumped out of a plane… And the list goes on.  I wanted to do those things for myself, and I did them.  I wanted to find a gov’t co-op, and I did.  I work hard, b/c I believe in hard work.  If you wanna get somewhere in life, you need to push yourself, because there is ALWAYS ROOM FOR IMPROVEMENT.  I sincerely belive that.  It doesn’t mean that I’m any less at this point in my life, it just means that I strive to be better than I was yesterday, to be better than I was last year.  B/c I want what’s best for myself, and for those I care about.  I think working hard, and enduring the hardships in life make you a stronger person.  I call them character defining moments…  I love character defining moments, they teach you so much about yourself, sometimes things that you don”t want to know, but b/c you know them, you can work on improving them.  If you don’t confront the issues, then how do you solve them?  I’m too solution-oriented to focus on all the mumble jumbo beating around the bush bullshit.  There, I said it.

Anyways, I’ve procrastinated long enough.  I was always really good at that heheheh

Thanks for listening to the little rant…. hahah

I find as we’re getting older, our tastes are becoming more refined…. which means that we have very little time for our friends, which is really unfortunate…  Maybe that’s a part of growing up?

I’m looking forward to school on monday, but at the same time, I’m kinda sorta scared shitless…..12 credits, full time work and part time work…. I’m not sure how I’m going to manage yet… But I’m sure I’ll find a way….SOMEHOW! I do miss school… *sigh*

Well, not enough time to reflect yet, will do it soon…. hahah

Wishing you and yours a very Happy New Year filled with lots of joy, laughter and memorable moments <3

To laugh is to risk appearing the fool.

To weep is to risk appearing sentimental.

To reach for another is to risk involvement.

To expose your ideas, your dreams, before a crowd is to risk their loss.

To love is to risk not being loved in return.

To live is to risk dying.

To believe is to risk despair.

To try is to risk failure.

But risks must be taken, because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing.

The people who risk nothing, do nothing, have nothing, are nothing.

They may avoid suffering and sorrow, but they cannot learn, feel, change, grow, love, live.

Chained by their attitudes they are slaves; They have forfeited their freedom.

Only a person who risks is free.

- Anonymous

Fall is here.  I love fall, but I love Christmas more! =)

A little realization that I had recently:

Not only do people need people, but people need to feel needed too.

Guess that makes us all quite needy people eh? lol hahah It makes the world turn…and again, everything in moderation =)

I’ll try to keep the updates a bit more regular

So, school is getting chaotic again, I have to start applying to more co-op jobs b/c I REALLY want to find a gov’t co-op job for this fall 2009…

Things are looking up… lol I thought they never would, but they finally have….lol Even with all the set backs with my ankle…. I’m learning to be patient, albeit it can be challenging at times… *roar*

This one has to be short and sweet b/c I have two job applications to apply to today, AND I have to start/complete research for my paper…

ENJOY THE SUNSHINE~

It’s been a rough little while for myself, but with the seasons changing, school starting and picking up again, being fortunate enough to surround myself with a handful of amazing people… damn…what more can a girl ask for? lol I have a renewed faith in the world, in people, in myself… and my my… it’s been a while.  I think I just needed to go through what I went through…had to go through the motions… and once that’s said and done…. life gets better…. lol

It’s also a MAJOR bonus that I got my FIRST A+ in a course in my 18 years of education!!!!!!!!!!!!! My VERY FIRST!!!! lol I’m ESTATIC! And absolutely FLOORED! lol The GOOD kind of floored! hehe SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO AWESOME! I LOVE that class SOOOOOOOOOOOOO MUCH and find myself missing it terribly as well!

Even though this year has been a bit challenging for me, I’m soooo fortunate to have met sooooo many amazing and wonderful and wonderfully supportive people.  It’s more than I could have ever asked for, hoped for, expected.  Just so amazing!!!!!!!!

Life gives us lemons, and then we choke on them for a while, then we learn to make some lemonade. HAH.

I also wanted to share something with you guys, I had to write my own obituary for one of the assignments… It’s kind of personal, but I thought it would be interesting to share.  Writing it was hard, but it really makes you wonder… You guys may want to consider what your obituary would sound like toos… Anyways…this is what I came up with:

Lisa T., 87, died today from a complication during a surgical procedure.  She is survived by her husband, 2 kids and 5 grandkids.  She was fortunate enough to meet her grandkids and spend time with them in their precious years of youth and adolescence.  At the time of death, her principle endeavour was to spend as much quality time with her family, friends and loved ones.  She enjoyed spending time in coffee shops with a good book, listening to good music and engaging in heated debates/arguments with her husband and any other person who was up for the challenge; she always loved a good debate.

She wanted to spend her remaining years doing what she loved, which included salsa dancing with her husband, skydiving, indoor soccer and rollerblading.  She will be honoured by those who could appreciate her brutal honesty and remembered by her loved ones because of her persistence, dedication and reliable personality.  She will be missed by her nieces and nephews because of her love and patience with them.  They meant the world to her, just like her own kids did.  She was loved by the people in her life, because she did what she could to listen to them with an empathetic ear.  She strongly believed that to make a difference in the life of one is to make a HUGE difference.

She made contributions in the areas of Communications and was most proud of her success in her younger years as a marketing entrepreneur who was willing to take risks by doing things her own way.  Her meticulous personality, mixed with her unpredictable edge made her marketing strategies the first of their kind.  She believed that there was more to life than money, power and prestige.  She was also notorious for her love of quotes and the one quote that she used frequently, ever since she first discovered it was: “You were born an original, don’t die a copy.” –Anon.

And with that, I will leave you guys with something to ponder…

Life is short, live it well.  Even if you don’t know how, ride out the waves, and things will get better…eventually

There’s always a happy ending.  If you’re not happy, it’s not the end.  -anon.

Between holding a hand and chaining a soul.

And you learn that love does not meaning learning

And company does not always mean security

And you begin to learn that kisses aren’t contracts

And presents aren’t promises.

And you begin to accept your defeats

With your head up and your eyes ahead

With the grace of an adult

Not the grief of a child

And you learn to build your roads on today

Because tomorrow’s ground is too uncertain for plans.

After a while you learn that even sunshine burns if you get too much.

So you plant your own garden

And decorate your own soul

Instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers

And you learn that you can really endure,

That you really are strong

And you learn…

With every goodbye you learn.

So, what is the purpose of pain?  I’ve still yet to decide…. I think pain is put into our lives so that we can learn… People learn best when things hurt, it’s like a survival mechanism.  Pain is important because it reminds us that we’re still alive, we’re still kicking, and as long as we’re still alive and kicking, we’ll be okay… eventually…

But why does pain have to hurt so much?  Why can’t there be a switch to turn it off?  Emotional pain is just one of those things where you can’t pop an advil to make the pain go away…although i’m sure there is..considering our rampant use of drugs nowadays.  But I believe in doing it the ol’ naturel way, which just means it’ll hurt more for longer… Then what?

Life can be challenging, I get that, it’s suppose to make us stronger people in the long run, but it still hurts…

And my soon-to-come period just makes things feel 10 billion times worst…. I can’t wait til mr. period pays me a visit so then my mental state can go back to “normal” whatever the hell that means….